Signs You Grew Up With Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder
Mental health

Signs You Grew Up With Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder

Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder, compared with BPD, is a complex mental health condition where individuals often internalize their emotional struggles, making them less obvious to those around them. It is a less obvious mental disorder but can be very distressing to the individual having it.

In this article, we will explore the signs that indicate you grew up with quiet borderline personality disorder. It is essential to remember that only a qualified mental health specialist can provide an accurate diagnosis, but understanding these signs can shed light on understanding the quiet borderline personality disorder and help you determine if you grew up with it.

What is Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder?

Signs You Grew Up With Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder

Quiet borderline personality disorder is often used to describe individuals with borderline personality disorder (BPD) who may internalize their emotional struggles, resulting in less noticeable outward behaviors. These individuals may still experience the core symptoms of BPD but express them more subtly or self-directedly.

Common features of quiet BPD include intense mood swings, a fear of abandonment, impulsivity, self-destructive behaviors, and tumultuous relationships.

It’s essential to emphasize that “quiet BPD” is not an official diagnosis; a proper diagnosis is crucial to ascertain that an individual has quiet borderline personality disorder.

Signs    You    Grew    Up    With Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder

Signs You Grew Up With Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder

Below are the notable signs you grew up with quiet borderline personality disorder:

Intense Fear of Abandonment

People with quiet BPD often have a deep fear of abandonment, whether real or perceived. Growing up with this disorder or its traits may lead to a heightened sensitivity to rejection or abandonment.

Chronic Feelings of Loneliness

Despite the desire for close relationships, individuals with quiet BPD may feel persistently lonely or disconnected from others.


Individuals who grow up with quiet borderline personality disorder experience periods of dissociation, where there’s a disconnection from one’s thoughts, identity, consciousness, or surroundings.

Subtle Signs

One of the major signs you grew up with quiet borderline personality disorder is that you will exhibit subtle signs, such as self-harming behaviors, chronic feelings of emptiness, self-criticism, or social withdrawal.

Internal Struggles

Individuals who grew up with quiet BPD may keep their emotional struggles hidden from others, making it challenging for friends, family members, or acquaintances to recognize their inner turmoil.


Some individuals with quiet BPD are skilled at masking their emotional distress in social situations, appearing calm or composed on the surface while experiencing emotional turmoil internally.

Difficulty with Emotional Regulation

One of the signs you grew up with quiet borderline personality disorder is that they may struggle to regulate their emotions, leading to frequent mood swings or difficulty managing emotional responses.

Chronic Feelings of Emptiness

A persistent feeling of emptiness or inner void can be a characteristic and one of the signs that you grew up with quiet borderline personality disorder.

Difficulty with Self-Identity

A lack of a clear and stable sense of self can lead to identity confusion or feeling like a chameleon, changing to fit in with different social groups.

Difficulty Seeking Help

Individuals with quiet BPD may hesitate to seek help due to their more internalized nature.

Healing of Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder

Signs You Grew Up With Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder

While there is no specific “healing” process for “quiet borderline personality disorder” (BPD), if you happen to have a couple of these symptoms, the first and most crucial step is to seek help from a mental health specialist, for instance, a psychiatrist, therapist or clinical psychologist.

They can help carry out examinations on you and provide an accurate diagnosis that will aid them in developing a personalized treatment plan. Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and Schema Therapy effectively treat BPD.

Also, therapy can help individuals with quiet BPD learn healthier coping mechanisms, improve emotional regulation, and develop better interpersonal skills.

Medication may be prescribed to manage specific symptoms associated with quiet BPD, such as mood swings, anxiety, or depression.

A psychiatrist can determine whether medication is appropriate and which type may be helpful. It is imperative to remember that healing from quiet BPD is a gradual process that may take time and effort.

Is Quiet BPD Obvious?

No, Quiet borderline personality disorder (BPD) is not obvious. It is less outwardly noticeable than BPD’s more classic or “outward” presentation.

In contrast to individuals with BPD, who may exhibit dramatic emotional outbursts or impulsive behaviors, quiet BPD tend to internalize their emotional struggles and may not display these behaviors as openly.

As a result, quiet BPD can be less obvious to others, but it is no less distressing for the individual experiencing it.

What Triggers Quiet BPD?

Various factors can trigger or exacerbate the quiet borderline personality disorder (BPD). It’s important to note that BPD is a complex and multifaceted condition, and different individuals may have different triggers or experiences. Some common triggers for quiet BPD can include stressful life events, rejection or abandonment, interpersonal conflict, negative self-talk, identity issues, and trauma reminders.

How Painful is Quiet BPD?

Quiet borderline personality disorder (BPD) can be just as painful and distressing as other forms of BPD, even though its presentation may be less outwardly dramatic. The pain experienced by individuals with quiet BPD is primarily internalized, and they often struggle with intense emotional turmoil, self-doubt, and instability in their self-identity.


Growing up with Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) can be an emotionally challenging and complex experience for individuals who possess these traits and those in their lives. While the signs and symptoms of Quiet BPD may not be as outwardly obvious as the classic presentation of the disorder, they are no less painful and disruptive to an individual’s well-being.

It’s important to emphasize that a qualified mental health professional establishes a diagnosis and treatment plan for Quiet BPD. With the proper guidance and therapy, individuals with Quiet BPD can learn effective coping strategies, improve emotional regulation, and work towards healthier, more fulfilling lives.

Hy I'm iffy!! A chronic worshiper with a DIY spirit! After a near death experience I started my journey to living a more purposeful life.

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